Archive For The “Here I Am” Category

Spring Break At Cedar Key

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Spring Break At Cedar Key

Just like a tree that loses branches and dead leaves in the Autumn, I will rebuild anew. I will rebuild new branches and leaves. I will rebuild and maintain only what bears me fruits. – Mitta Xinindlu When Barker Ajax reaches the end of his rope, he heads to the end of the road. Imagine you…

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My Mother’s Mom

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My Mother’s Mom

Youth fades; love droops; the leaves of friendship fall; A mother’s secret hope outlives them all.  – Oliver Wendell Holmes Grandmother must have been about forty-six when I first met her. I was already six weeks old myself and I couldn’t get together with her any sooner. Mom’s parents lived four hundred miles away, before…

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Art Is Painful

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Art Is Painful

I like art as thought better than art as work. I’ve always maintained this. It’s important to me that I don’t get my hands dirty. It’s not because I’m instinctively lazy. It’s a declaration: art is thought. – Dan Flavin Pain  is inescapable,  and must be met  with suffering.   Suffering is raw  and must be…

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Sunday Afternoon (Not Entirely Broke With A Tailwind)

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Sunday Afternoon (Not Entirely Broke With A Tailwind)

The road must eventually lead to the whole world. – Jack Kerouac Practically blissed out. Barker Ajax driving back home  from a brief errand or two. You have to know Barker to understand. He’s 75 and the sun is bright  and the sky blue and the music is playing.I have been to the drugs store, he thinks. Government selling hash brownies…

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Grocery Shopping Without A Mask

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Grocery Shopping Without A Mask

The purpose of life, after all, is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for a newer and richer experience. – Eleanor Roosevelt I have been married three times. Not like I am a coward. And not like I don’t wish to taste newer and richer…

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Greetings From God’s Waiting Room

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Greetings From God’s Waiting Room

Second only to suffering, waiting may be the greatest teacher and trainer in godliness, maturity, and genuine spirituality most of us ever encounter. – Richard Hendrix Arrived here for a good reason, stayed by accident, partnered by harmonious matrimony, corralled by coincidence, tethered by impecunity. Barker Ajax had long thought of himself secreted in Federal…

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The Story You’ve Always Wanted To Tell

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The Story You’ve Always Wanted To Tell

In terms of size, mammals are an anomaly, as the vast majority of the world’s existing species are snail-sized or smaller. It’s almost as if, regardless of your kingdom, the smaller your size & the earlier your place on the tree of life, the more critical is your niche on Earth: snails & worms create…

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Out A Little Late With Miller And Bukowski

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Out A Little Late With Miller And Bukowski

If you have the ability to love, love yourself first. – Charles Bukowski I study writers like a eccentric philatelist examines a rare stamp. Like a recently hired assistant coach watches videotape of an upcoming opponent. What makes him special? Study authors like a little boy who wants to be just like them. How do…

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Fear & Loathing In Florida

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Fear & Loathing In Florida

We are living in dangerously weird times now. Smart people just shrug and admit they’re dazed and confused. The only ones left with any confidence at all are the New Dumb. It is the beginning of the end of our world as we knew it. Doom is the operative ethic. – Hunter S. Thompson After…

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Covid Report – Second Anniversary

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Covid Report – Second Anniversary

The strongest prison is the one where you are afraid to leave even though the door is open! There is no more heavy imprisonment than being afraid to be free! – Mehmet Murat ildan The United States reported more deaths from COVID-19 last Friday (3/4/22) than deaths from Hurricane Katrina, more on any two recent weekdays than…

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