At first you laugh, then you imitate laughter, then you stop laughing. – Laurie Anderson
America, if you’re listening… I know some shit because I have seen some shit. Nobody knows the troubles I’ve seen. Nobody knows my sorrows. And I got me some sorrows. Are you so naive? Do you really think everything works out in the end? Unplug my pants. Promises made, promises kept. Oh, yeah. Windmills don’t cause cancer – fear of extinction causes windmills. Feel the breeze.
America, if you’re listening… From Truman to Trump. The White O.J. Before coloreds became Negroes before they were black before African-Americans. Before television back when telephone party lines were the leading form of entertainment. Neighborhood gossip was the content. When shaven fathers in felt fedoras wore suits to cheer at ballgames and short, slow immigrant sons played professional basketball. And nobody dunked. First place I ever ate yogurt was at the United Nations because everybody knows only foreigners eat yogurt. Obama was half-white, don’t forget.
America, if you’re listening… we all went to church especially on the holidays and nobody killed the cute little girl down the street for no particular reason. Only bad girls smoked and all the girls wanted to smoke even the girls who claimed they didn’t. The only good girls are bad girls who haven’t been caught. And it’s not nobody’s fault they look like bite-sized frosted donuts you just want to pop into your moist hungry mouth. That’s just nature. The tastiest of them look milk-chocolate-covered. Lovingly browned. Like strawberry myself. Maybe peach. In heels. Life is an injury waiting to happen. More nature.
America, if you’re listening… Money is not speech. There is no gene for wisdom. The elephant in the room is your attitude and the turd in the punch bowl is your truth. You are only as good as your right-now. The meek don’t inherit the earth, the Believers burn it down in the name of golden images. And tell you it was your fault. Put your mask on first before trying to help someone else. Corporations are not people. Sorry your flowers are fading.
America, if you’re listening… Gay marriage is a good thing. If they marry each other, nobody’s wife loses her husband to another man after thirty years together. Two studly retired Marines just moved in down the street from the lesbian love triangle. Stars & Stripes fly above both homes. If you can’t love the one they want you to love, love the one you’re with. Even if you are all alone. Especially. Objects may closer than they appear. Squeeze.
America, if you’re listening… there’s a direct connection between the fetal heartbeats of angels and traumatized children in wire cages. First thing we do, we get rid of all the private jets. Make the bastards fly commercial. Had a dream I got an unpaid internship at Trump Yellowstone, shampooing poodles at WildLife Rescue! By Ivanka. A really, really, look at my breasts, Limited Liability Corporation. Think she wants me. Had to sign a non-disclosure agreement and concede the correct pronunciation of origin is “orange.” Competitor’s coupons not accepted.
America, if you’re listening… Be more human and when in doubt, be more dog. We are pack animals. We don’t turn on one another. Expand your tribe. Spay and neuter your pets. Pick up your poop. Cross at the light. Rotate your tires. Take a breath deeply. For the sake of everybody in the band, act like you got some sense. When did soulessness become a movement? Fear the wicked, not the different. Sweat no shit you don’t really care about.
America, if you’re listening… There was no rock ‘n’ roll. Major league ballplayers had to get jobs in the off-season. Eight teams, four television channels. No TV dinners. Fuck, there were no microwaves. You think you’re the statue, when you’re really just a pigeon. Late is not too soon to get right. Science or religion? One you understand and don’t believe, the other you believe and don’t understand. Wrong about both. If I can only just get off this freeway without getting caught or killed… In lieu of flowers, please send an edible arrangement. Dead, I’ll still be hungry. How about you?
America, if you’re listening… I hold these truths to be self-evident.
