So, I am looking at last year’s major non-fiction book. Basically, a bunch of letters from a young black writer to his son. Bout how to be a man and black and American. Guessing that’s what it’s about anyway. Haven’t actually read it. But you can’t miss it. So I got to thinking, how about an old white guy writes his grandsons and tells them what it was like to be a handsome and lanky broke ass freelance wordsmithie and the world’s slowest professional runner. Offer some wisdom. This is the start. – JDW
[Your grandmother thinks that painting is gross.]
The codpiece goes in front.
Ask the pretty girl
to dance.
Drive your Sunday car
everyday.
Make the first move.
Never lie
if the truth is good enough.
Greed is not good.
Government is not a business.
Corporations are not people.
Money is not speech.
Play sports.
Make music.
***
Learn an instrument.
At least try long enough
so your parents have to
spend money they can’t afford
we all know you are going to quit soon anyway.
Insist on having a dog.
Name it whatever the hell you like.
That’s YOUR dog.
***
Think about somebody else
every once in a while.
You will enjoy that.
Go to church.
Church is like an instrument.
Many of us quit.
But you need to know what you are giving up.
This is true about a lot of stuff.
***
I once told a stranger
the third marriage is the best.
And your Nana says,
“Well, then, I can hardly wait for my next one.”
Never let anybody tell you
who to love.
***
Listen to what they say,
but always always always always
watch what they do.
You are just asking for trouble
if you wear a hoodie.
***
Read read read
like books are your favorite drug.
Propel yourself into sensations
but cover your ass.
Stupid, slow and ugly
that’s a bad combination.
So, stay fit.
Stay nimble, stay agile.
Smooth.
The rest you can fix.
***
Don’t cheat yourself
or anybody else.
Fall down twice,
get up three times.
Start every day new.
Be forgiving of yourself and others.
Everything is a choice…
choose wisely.
Be your own hero.
***
Your grandmother wanted me to emphasize
She thinks that painting is gross.
***
https://www.newyorker.com/books/page-turner/a-brief-history-of-the-codpiece-the-personal-protection-for-renaissance-equipment