The Inside Story Of Men (In A Nut Shell)

"If you are a colossal fan of epic poetry serving up a metaphorical tour of the Collapse of Western Civilization and have ever seen an actual boner with your own eyes, maybe even touched one..." here Barker Ajax stopped.
A Promethean quest to grow the male member leaves some men desperate and disfigured. 

THEY WANTED IT

because 
they’d just gone through a bad breakup 
and needed an edge in the volatile dating market; 

because porn 
had warped their sense of scale; 

because 
they’d been in a car accident, 
or were looking to fix a curve, 
or were hoping for a little “software upgrade”; 

because 
they were NOT having a midlife crisis; 
because “it was cheaper than a Bugatti Veyron”; 

because, 
after five kids, 
their wife couldn’t feel them anymore; 

because 
they’d been molested as a child 
and still remembered 
the laughter of the adults in the room; 

because they couldn’t forget 
a passing comment 
their spouse made in 1975; 

because, 
despite the objections of their couples therapist,
they believed it would bring them closer 
to their “sex-obsessed” husband 
(who then had an affair that precipitated their divorce); 

because 
they’d stopped changing in locker rooms, 
stopped peeing in urinals, 
stopped having sex; 

because who wouldn’t want it?

Because Who Wouldn’t Want It?

Mick (his middle name) wanted a bigger penis 
because 
he believed it would allow him 
to look in the mirror 
and feel satisfied. 
He had trouble 
imagining what shape 
the satisfaction would take, 
something he’d never actually experienced. 

Small and dark-haired, 
he’d found his adolescence
a gauntlet of humiliating comparisons: 
to classmates 
blond and blue-eyed; 
to his half brothers, 
older and taller and 
heterosexual; 
to the hirsute men 
in his stepfather’s Hasidic community, 
who wore big beards 
and billowing frock coats. 

After he reached puberty - 
late, in his estimation - 
he grew an impressive beard of his own, 
and his feelings of inadequacy 
concentrated on his genitals.
None of Mick’s romantic partners 
ever commented on his size, 
but his preoccupation could kill the mood. 
Tried several kinds of self-acceptance therapy, 
without success; 
whenever he went to the bathroom, 
there IT was, mocking him. 
“Like an evil root,” he said of the fixation. 
“It gets in there and grows like a tree. 
But I think everybody has that 
on some level about something.”

After high school, 
Mick decided to study art and moved to 
Berkeley, California, 
where his mother had spent her hippie years. 
Eventually landing in Seattle, 
he supported his life as an artist 
by working in the hospitality industry. 
His paintings often depicted 
a human body glowing, 
as if transfigured, 
in a geometric landscape.

Over the years, 
Mick kept up with advances 
in male augmentation 
but wasn’t thrilled by the options. 
The gains from a vacuum pump 
were fleeting; 
hanging weights from the end of his shaft 
seemed 
like a painful investment 
for an uncertain result; 
and having a surgeon snip 
his suspensory ligament, 
which promised an additional inch or so, 
could lead to wobblier erections. 

The Spring! of 2019, 
when he was thirty-six, 
came across something appealing: 
a silicone implant shaped 
like a hot-dog bun 
which could be inserted 
just under the skin of the penis 
to increase its girth 
and flaccid length.
The Penuma, 
had been invented by James Elist - 
a silver-haired urologist -
who has been described as 
“the Thomas Edison of penis surgery.” 
Elist’s procedure was touted as reversible, 
and, 
according to a rapturous article in GQ, 
more than a thousand men 
had already undergone it. 
It was also, as far as Mick could tell, 
the only genital enhancement on the market 
to have received the blessing 
of the Food and Drug Administration.
Endorsed by Doctor Fauci?

Endorsed by Doctor Fauci?

The basic operation would cost 
fifteen thousand dollars - 
roughly half of Mick’s life savings - 
though he added 
a pair of discounted testicular implants, 
at seven grand more. 
He put down a deposit,
told his long-distance boyfriend 
he was taking a work trip, 
and, on a sunny morning in September, 
arrived at Elist’s office, 
in Beverly Hills. 

A framed copy of the GQ story - cover line: 
“We Have Huge News About Your Manhood” - 
hung on the wall of the exam room. 
Elist strode in, 
directed Mick to drop his pants, 
and rolled Mick’s scrotal sac appraisingly between his fingers, 
as though it were a piece of fruit at a market stall.
Elist’s hands seemed reassuringly delicate, 
but Mick wanted to see the implant 
before it was put inside him. 
The surgeon clicked open a briefcase 
containing three translucent sheaths: 
Large, 
Extra Large, 
and Extra Extra Large. 

The device felt stiff to Mick’s touch, 
but Elist told him over time it would soften 
to the consistency of a gummy bear.
The consultation lasted five minutes. 
He signed a stack of consent forms and releases, 
one said his consultation had lasted 
more than an hour, 
and another promising “not to disclose, 
under any circumstance,” 
his “relationship with Dr. James J. Elist.” 
The operation took place the same morning 
in an outpatient clinic up the street. 
In the pre-op room, awaiting his turn, 
he watched “Rush Hour” in its entirety 
on a flat-screen TV.
When the surgery was over, 
Mick, still groggy from the general anesthesia, 
took an Uber to a Motel 6 near the airport, 
where he spent the next five days 
alone on his back, 
his penis mummy-wrapped in gauze. 
Morning erections were excruciating. 
Sharp jolts seized his crotch 
whenever he peed, 
which he could do only 
by leaning over the bathtub. 

He’d anticipated some discomfort, 
but when he changed his gauze, 
he was startled to see 
the corners of the implant protruding 
under the skin, 
like a misplaced bone.
Back in Seattle, 
the Penuma’s edges continued to jut out, 
particularly on the right side, 
although the testicular implants looked fine. 
He decided not to tell his boyfriend 
about the operation: 
talking to him would only make it seem 
more real, 
and he wasn’t yet prepared to entertain 
the possibility 
he’d made a terrible mistake. 
When he e-mailed Elist’s clinic, 
the staff urged patience, 
counselling him 
he was “continuing to heal as we expect.” 

Then he began to lose sensation.

Then He Began To Lose Sensation

“I know it’s been just three weeks 
and I’m following by the letter 
all the instructions 
but I’m a bit concerned 
about the look of it 
as you have seen in the pictures,” 
he wrote Elist.
“It’s been 70 days since surgery 
and yet it feels like a shrimp,” 
he wrote in November.
“I’m so sorry for another email,” 
he wrote in December, 
“but I am freaking out 
about the fact 
I have zero sensitivity in my penis!”
“Being totally numb is normal 
as mentioned in the past correct?” 
he asked later that month. 
“It will pass.  Correct?”

For much of the twentieth century, 
urologists devoted themselves 
to the prostate, testes, kidneys, 
and bladder. 
A man’s sexual function, 
or lack thereof, 
was largely considered a matter for 
psychoanalysts 
to puzzle over. 
It wasn’t until the late nineteen-seventies 
a handful of researchers began demonstrating 
that erectile troubles, 
though occasionally psychogenic, 
were primarily vascular in cause. 

Their discoveries transformed the mercurial penis - 
John Updike’s “demon of sorts . . . 
whose performance is erratic 
and whose errands seem, at times, 
ridiculous" 
- into a tamable medical object.

If The Penis Is The Antenna To A Man’s Soul

It was at this moment of upheaval 
Elist entered the clannish, hypermasculine world 
of American urology. 
Raised in a Sephardic family in Iran, 
he completed a residency in Washington, D.C., 
before the 1979 Islamic Revolution. 
Instead of going home, 
he remained in the States 
and went into private practice 
in Beverly Hills. 

There, he joined the vanguard of physicians 
treating impotence 
with a suite of novel procedures, 
such as injections 
and inflatable penile prostheses. 
“If the penis is the antenna to a man’s soul, 
then James Elist must be the Marconi of medicine,” 
Hustler announced in a 1993 profile. 
Larry Flynt, the magazine’s publisher, 
was among his celebrity clientele.
With the blockbuster launch of Viagra, 
in 1998, 
Elist feared demand for surgical cures 
for erectile dysfunction 
would fall, drop, peter out,
and decided it was time to diversify. 
Over the years, 
many of his patients had asked 
if he could make them bigger 
while he was down there. 
Walking around the 90210 Zip Code,
 where the median breast size 
seemed to balloon by the day, 
Elist realized his next move 
was staring him in the face.
As he toyed with an early prototype 
for the Penuma, 
other doctors were dismissive. 
The penis - a tentacle 
that shrinks and swells 
with an exquisite sensitivity - 
was nothing like the breast; 
it wouldn’t be possible, 
they told him, 
to put something static 
under its elastic skin.
The F.D.A. requires the pharmaceutical industry 
to conduct clinical studies of new drugs, 
SO
you might assume the same is required 
of medical-device manufacturers. 
However, 
a loophole known as the 510(k) process 
allows companies to implant untested products 
in patients
as long as they can demonstrate 
the devices are “substantially equivalent” 
to those already on the market. 

In September, 2004, 
not long after 
Elist convinced the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office 
of the novelty of his invention, 
he informed the F.D.A. 
his “silicone block” was comparable 
to calf and butt implants. 
A month later, 
when the agency cleared the device 
for the “cosmetic correction of soft-tissue deformities,” 
the word “penis” did not appear 
in its indications for use.
Despite the F.D.A. imprimatur, 
that's French for 'nothing to worry about,'
persuading men to get the implant was a challenge, 
even after one of his patients, 
Bryan, a twentysomething 
with biceps the size of porterhouse steaks, 
began modelling it for prospective customers. 
Bryan, who referred to himself as Elist’s “spokespenis,” 
also moderated content on My New Size, 
an online forum for male enhancement, 
where Elist’s invention was often extolled. 

Still, by 2014, the doctor averaged 
barely a hundred implant surgeries a year. 
It wasn’t until the 2016 GQ article 
his device - newly christened the Penuma,
 an acronym for Penis New Man - 
was propelled from the margins 
to the mainstream. 
By the end of the year, 
Elist was doing roughly 
sixty Penuma procedures a month, 
and his oldest son, Jonathan, left a job at McKinsey 
to become the C.E.O. of International Medical Devices, 
as they called their family firm.
Prominent urologists had long 
seen penile enlargement 
as the remit of cowboys 
and regarded Elist as such, 
insofar as they regarded him at all. 
As part of Penuma’s gentrification campaign, 
Elist got the F.D.A. to explicitly clear his implant 
for the penile region in 2017, 
noting in his application 
the “unique anatomy, physiology, and function 
of the penis does not increase 
the overall potential risks.” 

At conferences 
of the Sexual Medicine Society of North America, 
his company also began to recruit 
“key opinion leaders,” 
to advise the company and join its new board.
Among the K.O.L.s in the field of sexual medicine 
are those who install 
the highest number of prostheses 
to restore erectile function, 
typically in prostate-cancer patients 
or in men with diabetes. 
So entrenched is this hierarchy 
specialists frequently rattled off their colleagues’ stats. 
“It’s all about who has the biggest whatever 
and who has the bigger numbers,” 
Faysal Yafi, Director of Men’s Health at the University of California, Irvine, 
and himself a high-volume implanter, explained.
Elist’s first big catch was Steven Wilson, 
formerly a professor of urology at the University of Arkansas, 
who, until his apparent unseating by Paul Perito, 
a spirited upstart in Miami, 
was fêted as the highest-volume implanter in the country. 
(“Our Tom Brady,” Yafi said of Wilson, admiringly.) 

Wilson, a paid consultant for Elist’s company, 
helped vet skilled surgeons around the country 
who could be trained to perform the Penuma procedure. 
“The cosmetic revolution of the flaccid penis,” 
Wilson said, is urology’s “last frontier.”

Champions Of The Penis

On the conference circuit, 
where the goals of the revolution 
were the subject of fervid debate, 
Penuma surgeons argued 
urologists were at a crossroads. 

They could cede the augmentation market to quacks 
and overconfident plastic surgeons, 
or they could embrace their vocation 
as the so-called champions of the penis, 
and in their hygienic, well-lit clinics 
provide patients 
with what they’d been asking for 
and might otherwise find an unsafe way to secure. 
Just like back-alley abortions, right?

When the tabloids reported 
in March, 2019, 
a Belgian-Israeli billionaire 
had died on a Parisian operating table 
(that is so sad)
while getting an unknown substance injected 
into his penis, 
it seemed to prove their point. 
A month later, 
Laurence Levine, a past president of the Sexual Medicine Society of North America, 
successfully performed the first Penuma procedure 
outside Beverly Hills, 
kicking off the implant’s national expansion.
No pun intended.
Soon afterward, 
the pandemic began fueling a boom 
in the male-augmentation market -
a development its pioneers attribute 
to an uptick in porn consumption, 
work-from-home policies 
that let patients recover in private, 
and important refinements of technique. 

The fringe penoplasty fads of the nineties - 
primitive fat injections, 
cadaver-skin grafts - 
had now been surpassed not just by implants 
but by injectable fillers. 

In Las Vegas, Ed Zimmerman, 
trained as a family practitioner, 
is now known for his proprietary HapPenis injections.
He saw a 69% jump in enhancement clients 
after rebranding himself 
as TikTok’s “Dick Doc.” 

In Manhattan, 
the plastic surgeon David Shafer estimates 
his signature swag shot - 
short for “Shafer Width and Girth” - 
accounts for half of his practice. 
The treatment starts at ten thousand dollars, 
doesn’t require general anesthesia, 
and can be reversed 
with the injection of an enzyme. 

In Atlanta, Prometheus by Dr. Malik, 
a fillers clinic, has been fielding requests 
from private-equity investors.
In a business that’s often reduced to a punch line, 
enhancement entrepreneurs are unusually vocal 
about the perceived - or actual  - chicanery of their rivals, 
whom they see as posing a threat 
to their fledgling legitimacy. 
“What can we do 
to keep patients out of the hands 
of these charlatans?” 
Paul Perito, who developed a popular filler named UroFill, 
asked colleagues at a recent Webinar 
attended by doctors across the world. 
He displayed a slide 
highlighting an ad by Victor Loria, 
an osteopath and erstwhile hair-transplant specialist 
headquartered in Miami, 
whose permanent penile-filler injections 
were on sale for $14,950. 

Penile Girth Enhancement
Increase Your Girth with UroFill™
Penile Girth Enhancement
Safe. Effective. Proven. Non-surgical.

Loria’s concoction, 
mixed in-house, 
includes liquid silicone oil, 
which is typically used to refill damaged eyeballs. 
Perito described Loria’s methods as 
“practically criminal,” 
but Loria, who self-identifies as 
the highest-volume permanent penile-filler administrator 
in the nation, 
denies unethical conduct, 
defends the safety record of his product, 
and claims
Perito and his “bandits” were just upset 
he’d stepped into the urologists’ sandbox.
Penile Girth Enhancement
Ad copy. Increase Your Girth with UroFill™ Penile Girth Enhancement. Safe. Effective. Proven. Non-surgical.
What the Penuma promised the urologists 
was effectively what it promised patients - 
the chance to make it even bigger. 
Even as costs soar, 
physician-reimbursement rates from Medicare 
for complex operations have declined. 
Inserting an inflatable penile prosthesis 
to treat erectile dysfunction 
brings a surgeon around eight hundred dollars. 

For the Penuma procedure, 
which is not covered by insurance, 
that same surgeon can pocket six times as much.

During a call in January, 2020, 
four months after Mick’s Penuma surgery, 
Elist told him the sensation 
in his penis would return 
in time. 

Having invested so much, 
financially and psychologically, 
in the implant, 
Mick felt grateful 
for the doctor’s assurances. 
He tried to focus 
on his paintings, 
producing several large acrylic canvases 
in which forlorn human figures appeared 
to be tossed about by waves. 

But the numbness of his penis 
reminded him 
of having a limb fall asleep, 

indefinitely.

Primitive Fat Injections, Cadaver-Skin Grafts

In the paperwork 
Mick had initialed 
on the day of the surgery, 
the same way we all do,
a clause said, 
“The clinic highly discourages 
seeking information elsewhere 
as the information provided can be false, 
misleading, and inaccurate.” 

One day, though, 
Mick opened Google 
and searched “Elist,” 
Penuma,” 
“numb.”

“I was looking for people to tell me, 
‘Oh, yeah, I waited three months, 
and now everything’s fine, 
I am very happy,’” he said. 
Those people were hard to find.
A truck driver 
whose device dug 
into his pubic bone 
told me 
he felt like a “prisoner in my own body.”  

An executive at an adhesive company, 
who hid his newly bulging crotch 
behind a shopping bag 
when walking the dog, 
began to have nightmares 
in which he castrated himself. 

A sales specialist at an industrial-supply store 
sent me his diary, 
which imagined Elist as its addressee. 
“I wish you would have told me 
I would lose erect length,” he wrote. 
“I wish you would have told me 
it could shift 
and pinch my urethra 
and make it difficult to urinate.”
It was tricky 
to bend over 
to tie the laces of winter boots, 
tricky to slip on a condom, 
tricky to sleep in a comfortable position, 
tricky to stretch, 
tricky to spoon. 
“It makes you look like 
you’re always semi-erect,” 
a health-spa vice-president said 
of his Penuma. 
“I couldn’t let my kids 
sit on my lap. 
I couldn’t jump 
on the trampoline with them. 
I even felt like a pervert 
hugging my friends. 
And God forbid 
you get an actual erection, 
because then you have to run 
and hide it.”

Not Everyone Minded

Not everyone minded. 
Kaelan Strouse, a thirty-five-year-old life coach, 
was thrilled by 
both the “restaurant-size pepper mill” 
between his legs and 
the kilts he began wearing 
to accommodate it. 
Richard Hague, Jr., a seventy-four-year-old pastor 
at a Baptist church in Niagara Falls, 
said his implant made him feel 
like “a wild stallion.” 
Contented customers reported
they were feeling better 
about their bodies 
and having better sex, too. 

But 
getting a Penuma could require adjusting 
not just to a different appendage 
but to a different way of life. 
As one pleased Elist patient counselled others, 
“You have to treat your penis like a Rolex.”
For dozens of Penuma patients, 
the shock of the new 
was the prelude to graver troubles. 
Some, like Mick, lost sensation. 
Others said they experienced 
stabbing pains in the shower 
or during sex. 

Seroma, or excess fluid, was not uncommon. 
When a defense-and-intelligence contractor’s girlfriend, 
a registered nurse, 
aspirated his seroma with a sterile needle, 
a cup of amber fluid oozed out. 
The one time they tried to have sex, 
she told me, 
the corners of his implant 
felt like “someone sticking a butter knife inside you.”
Some implants got infected or detached. 
Others buckled at the corners. 
Occasionally these protrusions broke 
through the skin, 
forming holes that would fester. 

The hole of the health-spa vice-president 
was so tiny 
he originally mistook its fermented odor 
for an S.T.D. 

An engineer with gallows humor 
played me a video 
of the snorting crunch 
his penis made 
when air moved through a hole. 
He had two holes, 
and the skin between them 
eventually eroded -
a corner of the implant emerged, 
pearlescent.
Later, 
doctors unaffiliated with the Penuma 
would compare such penises to 
“a torpedo,” “a penguin,” 
“a pig in a blanket,” 
“a beer can with a mushroom sticking out on the top,” 
and “the tipped-down nose 
of the Concorde.” 

But the imperturbable assistants 
at Elist’s clinic, 
besieged by photographs 
documenting these phenomena, 
told patients 
they were “healing as expected” 
and “continuing to heal well!” 

It was only after months had passed 
and the men insisted 
they weren’t healing well 
at all 
Elist would sometimes suggest 
an “upgrade” to a bigger size 
would resolve their problems. 

Elist said in a deposition 
upgrades are 
“part of the process of the procedure,”
noting some patients 
“might need the upgrade 
with the larger implant 
or the longer implant, 
and that happens often.” 
Faced with the prospect 
of more surgery, 
some men began, 
quietly, 
to seek other advice.

Some Men Began, Quietly, To Seek Other Advice

The subculture of penile enhancement 
remains shrouded in stigma, 
because for a man to admit 
he wants to be bigger 
suggests he isn’t big enough. 

In February, 2023,
the rapper 50 Cent settled his claims 
against the Shade Room, 
a gossip blog he’d sued 
for falsely insinuating he’d had work done 
on his penis 
and subjecting him “to ridicule.” 

Only six 
of forty-nine enlargement patients 
agreed to have their last names printed, 
also fearing ridicule. 
In such a taboo and information-poor environment, 
anonymous testimonials 
can take on the authority 
of peer-reviewed journal articles.
Elist understood this dynamic. 
In addition to encouraging Bryan, 
the spokespenis, 
to post positive comments on My New Size, 
Elist tracked his own mentions 
on PhalloBoards and Thunder’s Place, 
other online forums for male enhancement, 
demanding moderators stop 
harboring “defamatory” statements. 

He offered a PhalloBoards user, 
after an abscess had formed, 
five thousand dollars 
for deleting his posts about the procedure 
and releasing the clinic from liability, 
according to a settlement agreement. 

Elist said through a spokesperson 
the patient didn’t follow post-op advice, 
and while he was not able to respond to some accounts in this story 
because men had requested anonymity, 
complications were rare.
A sign in Elist’s waiting room instructed patients 
not to speak to one another about medical issues 
the better to protect their privacy, 
Elist said through the spokesperson. 
But Elist could only do so much 
to disrupt the communities 
of unhappy men coalescing online.

 As Mick pored over hundreds of posts, 
he was horrified to discover 
he had been acting out a well-worn script. 
The others had also read the GQ article, 
learned the implant was “reversible,” 
and, heartened by the F.D.A.’s clearance, 
put down their deposit. 

They, too, felt their consultations were rushed 
and they hadn’t had enough time 
to review the cascade 
of consent forms they’d signed 
alerting them to potential complications.
Emmanuel Jackson, then twenty-six, was a model 
who had grown up in foster homes outside of Boston. 
He won a free Penuma in a contest in 2013, 
as part of a marketing campaign 
involving the rapper Master P. 

According to a complaint by the Medical Board of California, 
Jackson said 
he was given scripted answers 
for a promotional video, 
which later appeared on Elist’s YouTube channel. 
Elist’s spokesperson said Jackson volunteered 
his positive comments in the video, 
and Master P, 
who once featured Elist on his Playboy Radio show, 
said 
through his own spokesperson 
he was not involved 
with any YouTube testimonials 
for the implant.
Jackson didn’t find the other men online 
until 2018, around the time 
a doctor at the Cleveland Clinic told him 
his implant had fractured into pieces 
floating under his skin. 

A young Iraq War veteran 
whom Jackson met through PhalloBoards 
warned him 
having the implant out 
could be even worse 
than having it in. 
“He told me, 
‘Manny, you’re going to lose your mind.’
“He was right.” 
Medical records show, 
not long after the fragments were removed, 
Jackson attempted suicide.

Not Long After The Fragments Were Removed

“I’ve been threatened for saying the things I’m telling you,” 
Mark Solomon said. 
A plastic surgeon with an elegant Roman nose 
and a crisp white lab coat 
over a brown cashmere sweater, 
he’d learned the techne of male enhancement 
in Vienna in the nineties. 
But he never imagined that, one day, 
nearly half his male practice 
would involve fixing the handiwork of other practitioners. 

Now, 
as much as he liked to joke 
the last thing Beverly Hills needed 
was another plastic surgeon, 
he was doing such brisk business 
repairing Penuma complications
he’d relocated his practice from Philadelphia 
to an office 
down the street from Elist’s clinic.
As the number of Penuma procedures increased, 
a cottage industry emerged 
to treat what Solomon describes as 
a new class of “penile cripples.” 
William Brant, a reconstructive urologist in Salt Lake City, 
who sees about ten Penuma patients a month, noted 
“the deep despair of men who can’t unring the bell.” 
Gordon Muir, a urologist in London, said 
he’s been taking out Penumas 
“all the way across the bloody pond.” 

But other reconstructive surgeons asked 
to speak confidentially, 
because they were afraid of being sued. 
Solomon had received a cease-and-desist letter 
from Elist’s lawyers 
arguing the mere mention of Penuma on his Web site 
infringed on the implant’s trademark. 
Solomon now notes instead his expertise 
in treating complications 
from “penis enlargement implants."
From his satchel, 
Solomon produced a couple 
of biohazard bags. 
One held two sheaths of silicone 
stitched together 
with a blue thread: 
an early edition of the Penuma 
he’d removed from a patient. 
The other contained a modern Penuma, 
a single piece with a built-in crease. 

“Once this goes in, 
these men are never 
going to be the same 
again, 
because their penis 
is never the same 
again,” he said.
When a foreign object 
is placed in the body, 
the body reacts 
by forming an envelope of tissue 
around it. 
In the penis, 
a retractable organ, 
this new tissue can distort
shape and mobility, 
causing the penis to shorten 
and curve. 

The disfigurement can be exacerbated 
if the Penuma is removed, 
Solomon explained, 
since the penis can contract 
to seal up the vacuum of space - 
a phenomenon 
patients have called the “mini-dick” 
or “dicklet” phase.
To counteract retraction 
and scarring 
after removal, 
some men engage 
in an elaborate penile-rehab regimen. 
Solomon directs his patients to wear a condom 
with a metal weight at its tip 
six hours a day. 

Other doctors
who remove the device—
explanters, in the parlance—
prescribe RestoreX, 
a contraption whose painful clamp 
and extension rods 
its users compare to a medieval rack. 
These daily stretching routines 
are sometimes accompanied 
by further revision procedures, 
as well as by prescriptions for Viagra 
and antidepressants. 

The great irony - lost on few - 
after getting surgery to stop thinking about their penises, 
these men were now thinking 
about their penises 
all the time.

“The Deep Despair Of Men Who Can’t Unring The Bell.”

At conferences and in case reports, 
urologists across the country cautioned, 
although they were seeing only 
the subset of patients unhappy enough to seek them out, 
the complications those patients presented -
significant penoscrotal edema, 
severe erectile dysfunction 
necessitating placement of an inflatable penile implant 
during removal
could be “devastating” and “uncorrectable.” 

Uncorrectable.

Penuma surgeons, meanwhile, 
were collecting their own data, 
which showed the complication rate 
was both low 
and comparable 
to that of other procedures. 

In the largest study to date, 
published in The Journal of Sexual Medicine, 
Elist’s clinic surveyed four hundred 
of the five hundred and twenty-six patients 
who’d received a Penuma between 2009 and 2014. 
Eighty-one per cent of the subjects 
who responded to the questionnaire 
indicated “high” or “very high” levels of satisfaction. 

Other surgeons said 
they wouldn’t be associated with Elist’s invention 
if most of their patients 
some of whom, they added, were urologists themselves
weren’t similarly pleased. 

One of the Penuma doctors 
dismissed PhalloBoards 
as populated by patients 
who ignored post-op instructions 
and said it was propped up 
by “opportunistic” competitors. 
Elist’s consent forms 
included a provision releasing the clinic from 
“any liability” 
if a patient receives post-op treatment elsewhere, 
but Mick, 
confused about whom to trust, 
online or off, 
decided to seek a second professional opinion - 
and then a third, 
a fourth, 
and a fifth. 

Some of the physicians he consulted were, 
as Elist forewarned, 
baffled by the alien device. 
But Thomas Walsh, a reconstructive urologist, was not. 
He was struck that Mick, 
like other Penuma patients, 
had the misapprehension 
the device was easily “reversible,” 
as Elist and his network had advertised. 

As advertised.

“To fully consent to a procedure, 
the patient needs someone to tell him everything,” 
Walsh said. 
“He doesn’t need a salesman. 
The problem here is 
you’ve got someone who is inventing 
and manufacturing 
and selling the device. 
That personal investment can create 
a tremendous conflict of interest.” 
Elist, through his spokesperson, 
said his expertise with the device 
outweighs the conflict, 
which he freely discloses.
Before removing Mick’s implant, 
in May, 2020, 
Walsh ordered an MRI, 
which suggested the device was impinging 
on the nerves and arteries at the head 
of his penis. 
Walsh also sent Mick 
to a neurologist, who, 
after prodding Mick’s shaft 
with a sharp metal tool, 
declared the glans 
to have lost 
“total” sensation.
There was no guarantee 
sensation would ever return. 
The challenge 
of removing a Penuma, 
Walsh told Mick, 
can lie in the detachment 
of a rectangular piece of mesh 
from the tip of the penis. 

Mesh prompts the body 
to create scar tissue, 
which binds together everything 
in its vicinity.
To help the implant adhere, 
Penuma doctors stitched some 
near the head, 
an area dense with arborized nerves 
and blood vessels. 

Despite carefully planning 
the explanation, 
Walsh found himself disconcerted 
in surgery 
by the sight of his patient’s erogenous zone 
ensnared 
by the patch of plastic. 

“I feel like it’s sacrilege, 
wrapping a man’s neurovascular bundle in mesh,” 
Walsh later said. 
“How would anyone want to do that?”

“You have to treat your penis like a Rolex.”

It has been hypothesized 
a longer penis confers an evolutionary edge 
in launching the reproductive payload 
into the vaginal canal. 
But, 
as the journalist David Friedman recounts in 
“A Mind of Its Own,” 
a cultural history of the male sex organ, 
some primatologists who have seen male apes 
brandish their genitals during a fight have posited 
its purpose, if any, is simpler -
to impress and intimidate rivals.
“They notice the penis 
of a brother or playmate, 
strikingly visible 
and of large proportions, 
at once recognize it 
as the superior counterpart 
of their own small 
and inconspicuous organ, 
and from that time forward 
fall a victim 
to envy for the penis,” 
Freud wrote in 1925. 

He was referring 
to the “momentous discovery 
which little girls are destined to make” 
about their lack of a phallus. 

But his description more precisely captures 
"PENIS ENVY” 
which some men feel 
after catching a glimpse of the competition. 
As a clinical professor of urology put it, 
“It’s more of a locker-room thing than a bedroom thing.”
Yet, 
after biological explanations 
for impotence triumphed 
and urologists wrested the penis away 
from the psychoanalysts, 
they seemed to overlook the man 
and the society 
to which it was attached. 

Critics of male enhancement 
said they had no desire 
to body-shame men 
in search of something extra, 
noting women 
get breast implants 
without provoking
a moral panic. 

But, 
especially in the case of men 
with an unrealistic self-image, 
critics worried 
doctors seemed too eager 
to pitch a risky surgical procedure 
for what is a cultural, 
and, in some instances, a psychiatric, 
phenomenon.
What surgeons continually emphasized - 
the implanters with pride, 
the explanters with dismay - 
most of the men they were seeing 
had been of at least average size 
before going under the knife. 

“Most don’t have anything 
physically wrong with them at all, 
so what they don’t need is 
vultures preying on them, 
which is almost always a disaster,” 
Muir, the London urologist, said.
Almost always.

Photographic evidence supported this contention.

Along with other urologists and psychiatrists,
Muir conducted a literature review:
“Surgical and Nonsurgical Interventions 
in Normal Men 
Complaining 
of Small Penis Size.” 
The research showed men dissatisfied 
with their penises 
respond well to educational counselling 
about the average size, 
which is 3.6 inches long when flaccid, 
and 5.2 inches erect. 

The average girth is 3.5 inches flaccid, and 4.6 inches erect.

For men 
who have an excessive and distorted preoccupation 
with the appearance 
of their genitals - 
a form of body dysmorphic disorder - 
Muir said cognitive-behavioral therapy 
and medications 
may also be necessary.
Penuma surgeons told me 
they use educational videos, 
intake surveys,
and sexual-health therapists to make sure 
the men they operate on 
have realistic expectations 
and to screen for those with body dysmorphia, 
though only a handful 
of the patients I spoke to 
recalled being referred to a therapist 
before their surgery.
Shortly before the pandemic, 
Elist received a Google alert 
for “penile implant” 
and noticed something strange: 
Houston urologist Robert Cornell had been issued a patent 
for the Augmenta, 
a device that bore an uncanny resemblance to his own. 

The previous year, 
Cornell had asked to learn about the Penuma 
“expeditiously,” 
saying he saw a real opportunity 
to expand 
the level of service he offered to patients. 

Run Wang, 
that's his real name,
a Penuma board member 
and a professor 
at the University of Texas M. D. Anderson Cancer Center, 
had cautioned Elist 
Cornell could be a bit of a snake, 
according to Jonathan Elist. 

But father and son 
chalked up Wang’s warning 
to the machismo of the Texas urological market, 
and Elist invited Cornell to shadow him 
as he performed four Penuma procedures. 

Now, 
as Elist thumbed through Cornell’s patent, 
he was startled to see his future plans for the Penuma, 
which he said he recalled discussing with Cornell, 
incorporated into the Augmenta’s design.
In April, 2020, 
Elist and his company sued Cornell, 
alleging his visit to Beverly Hills was “a ruse” 
to steal trade secrets. 
Later that year, 
when Elist discovered 
Wang was listed as the Augmenta C.E.O. 
and had assisted the penile startup 
with its cadaver studies, 
Elist and his company added Wang 
as a party to the suit. 

Cornell and Wang 
did not comment for this story, 
though Wang 
denied through his counsel 
he’d called Cornell a snake 
and said in court filings 
he’d been named C.E.O. 
without his consent.
As so often happens.
When deposed, 
Cornell said he’d talked to Elist 
about marketing strategies, 
not proprietary specifics, 
and his invention had been spurred 
by potential hazards he’d observed 
during the surgeries, 
particularly the use of mesh. 

As both teams 
began conscripting high-volume implanters 
as allies and expert witnesses, 
the fraternity of sexual medicine 
was sundered into warring camps. 
“This is a tiny smear of people, 
and they are fucking cutthroat,” 
one high-volume implanter said. 
“It’s vicious because there’s so much money to make.”
Augmenta’s team endeavored 
to put the safety record of the Penuma on trial, 
securing Elist’s confirmation in a deposition 
that twenty per cent of the patients 
in his 2018 study 
had reported at least one adverse post-surgical event. 

Foster Johnson, his real name,
one of the Augmenta attorneys, 
also tracked down some of the patients 
who’d posted horror stories online. 
In 2021, he reached out to Mick.
A year had passed since Mick’s explant, 
and he’d entered a serious depression. 
He’d barely noticed when pandemic restrictions were lifted, 
because he’d continued to stay in his bed. 
Originally six and a half inches erect, 
he had lost an inch of length. 
Whenever he caught sight of himself in the mirror, 
he felt desperate.
So did other post-removal patients. 

An F.B.I. agent in his early thirties said 
he was afraid he would never date again, 
let alone start a family, 
because his penis had shrunk to a stub. 

A Hollywood executive 
who’d undergone multiple surgeries 
with Elist told me, 
“It’s like he also snipped 
the possibility of intimacy 
away from me.” 

The defense-and-intelligence contractor, 
who’d travelled the country 
to consult six reconstructive surgeons, 
said he’d tucked a Glock 
in his waistband 
before one appointment, 
thinking he might kill himself 
if the doctor couldn’t help.
Mick had come to believe
the only thing more humiliating
than being a satisfied 
penile-enhancement patient 
was being a dissatisfied one. 

Still, he tried to alert local news stations, 
the Better Business Bureau, 
the F.B.I., 
the district attorney, 
malpractice lawyers, 
the California medical board. 

No one returned his calls—
“Who could blame them 
when it almost sounds like a joke?”—
apart from an investigator 
with the medical board, 
who didn’t treat his distress 
as a laughing matter.
Neither did Johnson, who decided to tip off 
a Houston-based firm 
that specialized in class-action complaints. 
Last year, 
a Texas man accused International Medical Devices 
of falsely advertising the Penuma 
as F.D.A.-cleared 
for “cosmetic enhancement” 
when it was, until recently, 
cleared only for cosmetic correction 
of soft-tissue deformities. 
Jonathan Elist called the lawsuit, 
which awaits class certification, 
meritless. 

“It’s not medical malpractice,” 
he said. 
“And it’s not a product-liability case, either, 
which is what one might expect 
from something like this.” 
His expectations proved prescient 
when, in March, 
a personal-injury law firm in Ohio 
brought the first of what are now eight 
product-liability suits against the company. 
The lawsuits, 
all of which Elist’s spokesperson called “frivolous,” 
feature ten John Does.

Every Surgical Revolution Is Bloody By Definition

Every surgical revolution is bloody by definition. 

When I met Elist, earlier this year, 
he underscored how many 
taken-for-granted medical breakthroughs 
had emerged from tweaks 
and stepwise developments. 

The breast implant 
had been dogged 
by ruptures and leaks 
in its early days. 
Even the celebrated penile pump -
the object around which 
the egos of many eminent urologists now orbit -
had taken years 
to overcome high rates of removals. 

Two decades of innovation 
had led to the current Penuma procedure, 
he noted, 
and during that time 
nearly everything about it had improved, 
from the deployment of a drain 
to the placement of the incision.
 
“This procedure is like any other procedure,” 
he told me. 
“It has its own evolution.”
Recently, 
the Penuma procedure evolved again. 
Elist got rid of the vexing patch of mesh, 
and the company was shipping out a new model. 
He invited me to shadow him as he implanted it.
The first operation of the day complete, 
Elist was in a giddy, expansive mood. 

As his next patient was put under anesthesia, 
Elist sat behind an imposing desk 
in a borrowed office 
and spoke about his forthcoming book, 
a collection of parables 
for spiritually minded surgeons 
titled “Operating with God.” 
His ghostwriter had rendered his voice 
so skillfully, he said, 
he’d found himself moved to tears 
while reading it. 

Beside a gilt statue 
of a jaguar 
in the corner of the room, 
someone had propped 
a mirror 
with an image 
of Jesus etched at its center. 
As Elist recounted passages from his book, 
his merry face, 
crowned by a hairnet, 
hovered next to Christ’s.
The surgery, 
which Elist said 
was supposed to take 
approximately thirty-five minutes, 
lasted twice as long. 

A surgical technician 
had covered the patient’s body in sheets 
until only his penis, 
gleaming beneath the overhead lamp, 
was visible. 

With a purple marker, 
Elist drew a dotted line 
close to where the scrotum met the shaft. 
A clamp 
pulled the skin taut, 
and he began to cut along the line. 

The scrotal skin gave easily, 
like something ripe, 
and a few seconds later, 
the man on the table 
let out a high-pitched sound.

The Man On The Table Let Out A High-Pitched Sound

To stop the bleeding, 
Elist applied a cautery pencil 
that beeped 
each time it singed the skin, 
giving off smoke 
and a whiff of burned flesh. 

Alternating between his cautery tool 
and a pair of scissors, 
he deepened the incision, 
centimeter by centimeter, 
revealing the chalky tissue below, 
until he approached the pubic bone. 

Then, 
in a stage known as “degloving,” 
he began to flip the penis 
inside out 
through the hole 
he’d created at its base. 
Wearing the marbled interior flesh 
around his fingers, 
he trimmed the soft tissue 
and cauterized 
a series of superficial blood vessels, 
speckling 
the interior of the shaft 
with dark dots. 

For a few moments, 
a quivering red sphere 
popped up 
like a jellyfish 
surfacing at sea - 
an inverted testicle.
A nurse unwrapped 
an Extra Large implant 
from its box 
and handed it to Elist, 
who used curved scissors 
to smooth its top corners. 

With a hook-shaped needle, 
he began to sew the implant 
into the inverted penis, 
and he asked his surgical tech 
to tie a “double lateral” knot. 
He barked the word “lateral” 
several times 
and sighed. 

“She’s never seen this procedure,” 
he told me. 
When he asked for wet gauze 
a few minutes later, 
she handed him 
a piece they’d discarded. 
“You know that it’s dirty,” 
he reprimanded her 
in Farsi. 
“It was on the skin. 
And you bring it for me?”
Zimmerman, the “Dick Doc’’ of Las Vegas, 
had compared his own visit 
to Elist’s operating theatre 
to being 
“in the presence of a master conductor 
who can bring the whole orchestra together.” 

But as Elist chided his tech 
for being “a troublemaker” - 
she’d handed him the wrong size of sutures, 
an unnecessary needle, 
the wrong end of the drain, 
the wrong kind of scissors - 
it felt like watching 
the stumble-through of a student ensemble.
Elist cauterized more tissue 
by the pubic bone 
to make sure the implant would fit there, 
and at this 
the patient’s breaths rose 
into a moan. 

Elist regloved the penis 
with the Penuma 
tucked under its skin. 
Too long, 
he decided. 
He slid the implant out partway
 and snipped a bit off 
the bottom. 
Pushing it into the shaft, 
he wagged it 
back and forth. 
“O.K.,” he said. 

It was done. 

The patient, 
who had arrived that morning 
average-sized - 
four inches in length 
by four inches in girth - 
was now six by five. 
Later, 
through his spokesperson, 
Elist would say 
the patient’s outcome 
was excellent. 

In the room, 
talk turned to 
preparing the table 
for the next man.
Elist has always been keen 
to distance himself 
from other purveyors 
of controversial penile-enhancement techniques -
“gimmick” surgeons, he has called them. 
At one point during conversation, 
which was punctuated by lively digressions, 
he said 
some of his unscrupulous rivals reminded him of 
Josef Mengele, the Nazi doctor 
who conducted lethal experiments 
on prisoners at Auschwitz. 

“How do you allow yourself 
to put something on the patient’s body 
that you know gets infected?” he asked, 
as though addressing them directly. 

Sections of his Web site 
and of a book he self-published in 2015, 
“A Matter of Size,” 
are devoted 
to chronicling the macabre complications 
that can result from skin grafts
and fat injections 
to the penis.
In an underground archive 
for the Los Angeles County courts, 
actual records actually report
a decade before the Penuma came into being, 
Elist had been part of a coterie of L.A. surgeons 
promoting the very methods he now decried, 
with coverage in HustlerPenthouse,
Penis Power Quarterly, 
and local newspapers 
like the Korea Central Daily and the Korea Times. 

One ad, 
in Korean, 
for the surgery center 
where Elist operated 
sounded a familiar note, 
promising a “life-changing” procedure 
with no complications 
and “guaranteed results,” 
performed by “the Highest Authority 
in Urology in Beverly Hills,” 
“approved by the state government,” 
and “authorized by the F.D.A.”

“We Have Huge News About Your Manhood.”

At least twenty-three malpractice lawsuits 
have been filed against Elist 
in Los Angeles since 1993. 
He has also been named as a defendant 
in product-liability lawsuits 
regarding inflatable penile prostheses 
brought by plaintiffs Dick Glass 
and Semen Brodsky. 
Actual names, you can be sure.

The dockets indicate 
some complaints settled confidentially 
out of court, 
a few were dismissed, 
and in one of two trials 
a jury ruled in Elist’s favor.
It is not unusual 
for a doctor practicing 
for more than forty years 
to be accused of malpractice, 
and it is not unusual, 
either, 
for patients to be self-serving 
in their recollections 
of informed consent, 
but it's surprising 
to see how many of Elist’s past patients - 
who’d received cosmetic surgeries, 
medical procedures, 
or both - 
described the same M.O. 

Three men alleged 
they’d been asked to sign consent forms 
after being injected with Demerol, 
a fast-acting narcotic. 

A number of foreign-born patients 
seeking treatment 
for erectile dysfunction alleged 
they were given forms in English, 
which they couldn’t read.
 
Some of those same patients, 
who said they’d thought 
they were undergoing 
a vein-cleaning procedure, 
alleged 
they awoke from surgery 
to find themselves implanted 
with a penile prosthesis 
for erectile dysfunction. 

Multiple patients 
who turned to Elist 
for a functional issue 
alleged 
they’d been upsold enhancement procedures 
that resulted in their disfigurement. 

Ronald Duette, 
a sixty-five-year-old property manager 
and auto detailer 
who filed a malpractice case in 2021, 
said
a consultant at Elist’s clinic 
had encouraged him 
to get the Penuma 
by reassuring him 
Elist had one himself.
Elist’s spokesperson told me 
Duette’s allegations 
and the claims in the other lawsuits 
are false; 
Elist does not have a Penuma; and 
Elist is a gifted, responsive, and exacting surgeon, 
supported by conscientious employees, 
who does not rush his patients 
and performs additional surgery 
only when medically appropriate. 

The spokesperson said 
Elist was not aware 
of any patients suffer­ing 
extreme dissatisfaction 
or sleeplessness 
or mental-health crises 
as a result of Penuma surgery, 
and noted 
complications were more likely 
when patients failed to comply 
with post-op instructions. 

The spokesperson disputed 
some particulars 
of Mick’s account 
and said this epic poem
“cherry-picks and sensationalizes” 
outlier cases.
Elist said
what his critics failed to grasp -
by dint of envy or closed-mindedness - 
for every dissatisfied customer
there were many more 
whose lives had improved immeasurably. 

Nobody hears about the happy implantees, he said, 
because “unfortunately 
people are not willing to come out 
and talk about penile enlargement.”

“That’s The Part That Makes Me Almost Cry.”

The nine deeply satisfied Penuma patients  
said they would do it again. 
“I can give someone pleasure 
and see it in their eyes,” 
an industrial designer said. 
“That’s the part that makes me almost cry.” 

But hearing some of their stories 
you can't help wondering 
whether the difference 
between happy and unhappy customers 
was less a matter of experience 
than of its interpretation. 

Two men said 
they’d needed a second surgery 
to replace their implants 
when complications arose. 
One continued 
to volunteer as a patient advocate, 
even though he’d had his Extra Extra Large removed.

He explained, 
“It was very uncomfortable for my wife. 
She got micro-tears and 
considered getting a procedure done 
to enlarge that opening.”
Elist emphasized 
“the best advantage of Penuma over any other procedure” 
how easy it was to remove. 
He said 
some patients even gained length 
upon removal. 

Last year, 
Penuma’s monthly newsletter, 
“Inching Towards Greatness,” 
featured the YouTube testimonial 
of a man who, 
after his removal, 
said the procedure had still been 
“worth every cent.” 

This patient - 
who described his Penuma as a “life-ruiner” - 
said 
he’d been under the influence 
of drugs 
the clinic had prescribed at the time. 

Through his spokesperson, 
Elist declined to comment; 
the video is no longer available.

“It Was Very Uncomfortable For My Wife.”

In April, 
Mick received a letter 
from the office of California’s attorney general, 
notifying him of a hearing 
this October 
on Elist’s conduct. 

Since Mick had filed his complaint, 
the California medical board had investigated 
the surgeon’s treatment of ten other Penuma patients, 
including the contest winner 
Emmanuel Jackson. 

Alleging gross negligence 
and incompetence, 
the board accused Elist of - 
among other lapses -
recommending 
patients treat what appeared to be 
post-op infections 
with Neosporin, 
aloe vera, 
and a blood-flow ointment. 

Allegedly,
Elist asked them 
to remove their own sutures;
and deterred them 
from seeking outside medical care. 

Through his attorney, Elist said
innovative procedures like his 
are routinely reviewed 
by regulators; 
many specifics in the complaint are false; 
and 
a previous medical-board complaint 
against him 
was resolved in 2019, 
when he agreed to improve 
his recordkeeping.
Reading the letter 
from the attorney general’s office 
dredged up 
“dark thoughts from the ditch 
where I’d been burying them,” 
Mick said. 

In the three years 
since his Penuma removal, 
he estimates 
he’s regained about eighty per cent 
of the sensation in his penis, 
but his anger 
and sense of powerlessness 
have remained. 

In one of his last e-mails to Elist’s office, 
Mick wrote
he’d felt like “a testing mouse.” 

Given a recent expansion 
of Elist’s empire, 
the possibility 
the surgeon might be censured, 
fined, 
or lose his license 
now seemed to Mick 
beside the point. 

“They should have cut down 
the tree before it grew,” he said. 
“It’s too big now.”
In Times Square, 
a billboard recently appeared: 
“manhood redefined,”
it said, 
beside the URL 
for the Penuma Web site. 

A few weeks after 
Elist and his lawyer were served 
by the office of the California attorney general, 
Elist was travelling on the East Coast, 
training new recruits to his network. 
He's also pitched interested parties 
in the United Arab Emirates, Qatar, Kuwait, 
and South Korea, 
the world capital for cosmetic surgery. 

Colombia was already a go. 
“The Penuma is going to be 
the only procedure 
that surgeons 
not just in the United States 
but worldwide 
are going to accept,” 
Elist said.
In June, 
his company rebranded 
the updated Penuma 
as the Himplant, 
and the Augmenta trial unfolded 
in a federal courthouse 
in downtown Los Angeles. 

Elist testified 
with brio 
about his victimization 
at the hands of Cornell, 
who’d violated “the sanctuary” 
of his operating theatre. 

The judge ruled 
with Penuma’s attorneys 
that the negative experiences 
of patients like Mick were irrelevant 
to the question 
of theft at hand. 

On June 16th, 
the jury returned a verdict 
in Elist’s favor 
and invalidated Cornell’s patents.
Not long ago, 
Bryan, Elist’s former penis model, 
sat in a coffee shop in Orange County. 
He had undergone multiple surgeries with Elist, 
with two different iterations of the implant. 
He said he’d experienced complications 
and, in 2011, 
he’d had his second implant removed. 

The following year, 
Bryan ended up flying to Philadelphia 
for the first in a series 
of revision 
and enhancement procedures 
with Solomon, 
whom he’d learned about 
on PhalloBoards.

He Reminded Me Of Doctor Frankenstein

This spring, 
he was released from prison, 
where he’d served time 
for participating in a car-theft ring 
a prosecutor described as highly sophisticated 
and that Bryan described
as a matter of 
“incorrectly filled-out paperwork.” 

When he returned home, 
he got back into the enlargement scene. 
He now works as a paid patient advocate 
for Solomon - a role that involves fielding inquiries 
from men struggling 
with the fallout 
from unsatisfactory operations. 

The week before, 
Bryan had spent hours on the phone 
with Kevin (his middle name), 
an aspiring actor. 
Kevin said 
he had undergone five surgeries with Elist, 
including two upgrades, 
a revision, 
and a removal, 
and his penis no longer functioned.
Still, 
Kevin had always found the surgeon to be caring, 
if a little preoccupied. 
“He reminded me of Doctor Frankenstein - 
the intensity of him 
wanting this thing to come to life,” 
Kevin said. 

It sounded strange, 
he acknowledged, 
but before each operation 
he’d been filled with excitement. 
“You just feel relieved 
that you’re fixing something," 
he said.

“You Just Feel Relieved That You’re Fixing Something”

At an appointment earlier this year, 
Kevin said, 
Elist promised to fix him again 
with a sixth procedure. 
But one of the surgeon’s assistants 
discreetly advised against it. 

Kevin thought he could spot 
“the other experiments” in the clinic 
from their loose-fitting sweatpants 
and the awkward way they walked. 

There were so many men 
waiting to see the doctor 
they spilled into the hallway. ♦

The title speaks for itself. – Sean Spicer

word source: Ava Kofman.

https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2023/07/03/the-cutthroat-world-of-penis-enlargement

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