Imagine this tableau. High above the billowing clouds, in a golden castle, a common house fly – Musca domestica – solos out of a golden elevator and lands on a golden throne.
We should blame the Jews. Been done. How bout Muslims? How bout Mexicans? How about this, I wanna do this…Muslims AND Mexicans. Genius! That’s why you’re the boss.
I have an idea. Did you see that? The Florida governor doesn’t get a majority of the votes. First thing he does, he says ‘I’ll work for free and let’s get rid of all the government planes.’
Works for free and he’s over-paid. That governor got rich ripping off the government. Invoked his Fifth Amendment rights like one hundred times. More than Lee Harvey Oswald and that blonde lady who went to jail for far too long. Martha Stewart, I think.
Yeah. Would you do her?
He worries me. When asked if he might be too friendly with Putin, the guy said, “Nyet.” As long as we can start drilling in Yellowstone…
The Attorney General is not on board with everybody being equal. The Secretary of Education never went to public school, her kids never went to public school.
Our head of the Environmental Protection Agency says it don’t need protecting. Fuck clean air. Screw pure water. Yeah, we can afford bottled.
Torn between the career politician from the coal state and the career politician from the oil state. Hard to handicap. Although the Texas guy does look more Secretarial. Let’s put him in charge of the agency he couldn’t remember he wanted to get rid of. I like that!
We should get a Chinese woman, checks off two boxes. Yeah, those Asians are great at math. She’ll get the trains running on time. [indistinct] some Senate pillow talk. Won’t be able to roll the tanks if we don’t get some bridges repaired.
Militarize the police. Pay’em out the ass. While we’re at it, give our professional military a big raise. We’re gonna need’em. Oh, that’s good. Write that down.
You realize we do just one thing… You mean, the estate tax. Get rid of that, this whole deal pays for itself.
How about a Secretary of Labor who hates unions and the minimum wage? Already done.
What about jobs? We don’t need jobs. I mean, the people’s jobs. We pay the ones who do as they’re told. Maybe we should say, we plan to restore, oh, forget it. Just keep saying jobs.
Discredit the government. Discredit media. You guys know how to do it. Mumble something like conspiracy theory and change the subject.
Need generals. Vlad told me, make sure you have the generals. No generals, you can’t be sure the military will back your play. We can do that. Anybody says anything about the Constitution, just say, sour grapes, sore losers, over and over.
Have you seen The White House? Geezus, looks like someplace the Clampetts might live.
Mitt, bring me some more coffee.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KbQlPyLfhJ0